We aren’t who people feel that we are

All our lives we deal with people who have a judgement about us: our parents, teachers, friends, strangers, lovers, coworkers, etc. And vice versa. This does not mean however that we are who they believe us to be. Take for example, the guy I worked with in high school who said “You intimidate men.” I could not comprehend why this was- I was just a normal girl from East Gore, NS. But I carried his sentiment with me for years… trying to mould myself to be more palatable to people – not just men but women too. I didn’t want to be too outspoken, too attention seeking, too smart, too beautiful – in short “too much” of anything that would make others feel less than. So, I often stuffed myself into a box that I did not fit. All the hidden parts of me silently dying away inside. Now, this wasn’t all the time because my true self had the knowledge of how amazing it felt to be truly me, and that feeling of freedom could not be tamed forever. But then some man (or woman) would come along and tell me I was too something or not enough something. “You are too demanding” when I would voice my wants in a relationship. “You are too emotional” when I felt like my needs weren’t being met. “You are being unrealistic” when I would state my dreams of winters in a warmer climate. “Men like ____ (a whole list of characteristics that my friend was convinced were the only way to attract a man – most of which I was not)”....

You get what you go after!

It’s ok to want for something more. In your relationship, maybe you want:  *more romance                                                                                            *more love *more sex In your work/career, maybe you want: *more money *more variety *more clients In your leisure time, maybe you want: *more fun *more adventure *more learning I’ve had conversations with 3 different people recently who ‘wanted’ something. Client # 1 wanted a new job. She was afraid to leave the comfortable job she had but immediately looked into what she needed to do to change jobs anyway. (She has now left the old job and gone on to a new opportunity.) Client # 2 wanted to book a session with me but saw no availability on the day she had in mind. She asked me if that day was booked full or if my online scheduler was just showing it as full. (I don’t normally coach on Fridays but when she asked I had nothing going on that day, so I gave her an appointment.) (Potential) Client # 3 wanted to coach with me and was only available 6 hours out of the 168 hour week. (I work part time in customer service and schedule my coaching and Reiki clients around that. I was not available during those 6 hours as it coincided with my part time job. I offered early mornings, afternoons, evenings and weekends...

Reflections: do you like what you see?

I’ve had so many thoughts in my head lately for blog posts, and there’s one I keep coming back to over and over… I keep hearing the words of someone at a workshop I recently attended: “Watch the reflections.” Reflections are everywhere in our world. What we see in others is in us – the good and the bad. You wouldn’t recognize it otherwise. Sometimes it mirrors back to us the qualities we want to be – loving, kind, confident, happy. Other times, what we see isn’t what we like – jealousy, anger, arrogance, insecurity. Often when we see something we don’t like, we use it as a way to judge another person. Deep down, however, there is a part of us that is like that person. So, instead, we can use this judgement as an opportunity to go within and learn more about ourselves. Every person and situation that has been in your life has been there to help you grow (spiritually) whether you realize it or not. You can point fingers and lay blame, but your soul made a contract with their soul to share this experience in this lifetime. As I always say, sometimes someone has to be the bad guy (or gal). But it is hard to see this in the heat of the moment. Your ego wants someone to be ‘right’ and someone to be ‘wrong’. I’m not saying that people don’t do bad things that we wish they wouldn’t do. However, we always have a choice in how we deal with what happens. Since everything externally is a reflection of what’s going on internally, it can...

Wishing you all the best for 2016!

Hey friends! Unfortunately I don’t have a blog for you this month. I wish I had something brilliant for you about letting go of the old in order to create space for the new, but to be honest, my head (and my heart) just wasn’t it in this month. I would however like to wish you an abundance of blessings and blessings of abundance for the new year! Happy New...

What my Dad doesn’t know he taught me

“May the bird of paradise fly up your nose.  May an elephant caress you with his toes.  May your wife be plagued with runners in her hose.  May the bird of paradise fly up your nose.” – May the Bird of Paradise Fly Up Your Nose (Little Jimmy Dickens) Father’s Day was a couple of days ago. My Dad passed away in February of 2008. When he was in the hospital, he told me one night that he was going to teach the nurse how to sing “May the Bird of Paradise Fly up Your Nose”. I thought it was the morphine talking, but it’s actually a real song. My Dad and I didn’t have what I would say was a super close relationship, and that’s just how it was meant to be I suppose.  Of course, Dad did teach me some very hands on things…like how to play crib, to fish and to work hard. Unbeknownst to him I’m sure, there are a number of life lessons I learned from my Dad as well, and I wanted to share some of them with you.   No one ever said life was going to be fair. This is something my Dad always said. I can’t remember any specific reasons why – I just remember him saying it. And guess what? Life isn’t always fair. Or at least that’s how it seems anyway in our perception of what should be happening. But even when things don’t work out the way we want them to, they always work out exactly perfect for what we need at the time. Don’t beat around...

What if we questioned “the truth” and lived a soul guided life?

“Free, like a river raging. Strong, as the wind I’m facing. Chasing dreams and racing father time. Deep, like the grandest canyon. Wild, like an untamed stallion. If you can’t see my heart you must be blind. You can knock me down and watch me bleed, but you can’t keep no chains on me. I was born free!” -Born Free (Kid Rock) I remember very vividly not liking church when I was a child. I might have liked Sunday school, but church itself never thrilled me. I didn’t like sitting there listening to the minister talk, because I found it too boring. I also didn’t enjoy the singing of the choir; the songs sounded so forlorn. And…even at a young age, I had this sense that people were attending a service for one hour on Sunday to make up for all the ‘bad’ stuff they did the rest of the week (like gossiping about others in the community). It never made much sense to me. Yesterday, I went to church for the first time in years (for a baptism). I found it very difficult to listen to the minister because almost everything he spoke about was fear based. He talked about how we can’t allow people to think for themselves or make their own rules because then things would get out of hand and how we must follow the bible because it’s the “absolute truth”. (Never mind that each religious group interprets it a little bit differently.) He then went on to say that they (as a church) weren’t judgemental, although he was condemning those who don’t attend church every...

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